Monday, 26 August 2019

Are disabled getting really really silly about how we all post?

Image result for the grammar policeOr just the permanently pissed off snowflakes being listened to, when we should be ignoring them and throwing popcorn at them?  A poster was reprimanded and his post edited by a moderator on a UK disability suite because 'You highlighted something in bold type and we don't allow shouting on our site. You are also NOT allowed to use terms like 'us', them', or, 'we' or even 'community' without a proper clarification of who you mean..'  'You cannot assume everyone disabled will understand disabled issues or awareness issues, even on this site, your assumption is suggesting what they may not agree with or even understand.'  

The response was pretty scathing of that disability moderation perhaps an ultimate 'put down' of the ridiculousness of activism online, it didn't help, the poster got banned!

"Very laudable, but this is a disability site, not the UN or the home of the text police unless the site remit has changed?   Of course, everyone is different.  Especially disability areas who struggle with text or grammar e.g..  You are effectively preventing them from posting, or pulling them up on how they spell/post.  This site isn't even accessible to those with sight issues... It is unrealistic to expect every disabled person understands every other disabled person or their issue, or the plethora (1,000s with issues of non-disabilities), I don't have the time to address them all neither do you.  Of course, noting a disability site proclaiming to be disability-inclusive and aware my assumption seems perfectly legit to me.  Your own reply would suggest you are using the same 'assumptions'  you level at me as not on.  I understand your confusion.

As regards to awareness, it's an impossible situation, awareness is unviable or impracticable to pursue in any 'group' context all have own axes to grind.  Online,  a lot are singular/dedicated in view and pretty much unaware or disinterested in other people's issues. I cannot be aware of everyone and everything, nor, do I have the time, just add me to your list of discriminators if it makes you happy, my shoulders can bear it. We are all fighting for survival in the UK against a government who wants us out of the way we don't need to fight ourselves as well, I can appreciate a mutual moan helps some but I don't personally buy into that, I have all the paranoia I need.  

If you are preaching unity you are wasting your time, all disability sectors are doing own thing and have own areas and charities pursuing issues only they find relevant, the inclusion laws are for others it seems, your corner you fight it.

There is a 'virtual war' going on  about degrees of loss, labels, language usage, medical, and issues of outright NON-acceptance of other diverse people within it, or to support them, its a microcosm of cultural or disability angst I can do without and a mad scramble to declare THIS is what we are, THIS is what we need, THIS is how to ID us or THIS is how to post... etc... We all need to accept the diversity within disabled areas first. All I can say is THIS is how I post, and as I feel able if you don't like that..."

The anti-social Hard of Hearing?

Much angst still prevails regarding Hard of Hearing being viewed stupid or refusing to engage with hearing people, aka:

"I'm sure there's an army of people floating around who think I'm aloof!"

"Some in my family accuse me of not listening! I feel I am being blamed for being hard of hearing when I am listening very intently but often can't decipher certain words being used in a sentence."

"Apparently, ignoring people is a way to prevent stress in many of us, others assume we are anti-social and leave us alone so we don't then, have to struggle following them." 

"We aren't called the angry people for nothing I suppose, but I am not sure this helps us to de-stress, as it just makes isolation a more comfortable option. This works for the deaf with a signing culture because they band together, it WON'T work with us because we don't do that.  We don't even view fellow HoH as the same as us, we still see ourselves as hearing people, it used to be called denial, I don't know what they call it now."

ATR:  HoH are architects of their own issue, following the campaign trails of the Deaf 'blame game' hasn't worked for them, so no point us copying that.  The fact remains HoH are determined to want be included but equally determined not to suggest to people they HAVE a hearing loss at all.

There is considerable evidence to support this as they demand better hearing aids that people WON'T be able to see, aided and abetted by multiple adverts on 'hidden hearing' by manufacturers honing in precisely on that point to sell that view to them.  Quite how this addresses the issue of 'hidden disabilities' being more visible is never explained or clarified.

Perhaps if we asked for a ban on any advert that suggests we 'hide' our issue?  If the HoH sector would just fess up to the fact like anyone with hearing loss or deafness, confidence is pretty low in facing up to it all.  No point getting annoyed or 'aloof' to avoid the issue you really want to be addressed and cannot be addressed by law, only, by you raising your own awareness of what you need by being honest about it.

If you lie to hearing people, do the 'nod' of assent when you clearly haven't a clue, then you set yourself up for others getting fed up with you as they are assuming you hear and then not responding logically or at all to what is actually being said. Getting annoyed about your own failings is what it is all about, not that hearing loss is a failing, its a clinical fact of life, but how YOU address that fact has a primary bearing on how you get it accepted and empathised with.

If we do not hear or simply do not understand what is said, then the simplistic and logical answer to that is to say so.    There are alternatives to struggling to lip-read or something, they can be text-driven e.g. everyone can read and write usually its a start and again, not trying alternatives that WILL work is cutting off your own nose etc.  Forget the pride thing nobody is seeing that anyway.  

Accept a Hearing aid isn't for life, they aid what hearing you have left, but, that hearing can still itself deteriorate, and as we know, we, are the last to realise that, clues can be seen when gaps widen in your social life etc as you subconsciously withdraw from making the efforts.  Looking out for hearing deterioration as a clue may just delay your perception of what is really going on.  As soon as hearing loss is identified you really really need to start seeking out alternatives, not, wait until it is too late to do much about it."